Too many people today don't know who they are and as a result, construct a false image of themselves to fit in with the rest of society. They feel feel lonely, alienated and depressed. Many get caught up in bad relationships but feel too weak or afraid to leave their partners and move on with life. They become trapped inside a circle of negative emotions and as soon as they feel there's a glimpse of hope, reality reminds them of what it means to feel hurt or let down.

We live in a society that is obsessed with social activities, mass gatherings and crowd events. Many grow up without any sense of real identity and therefore associate themselves with people or products to form their own "unique" lifestyle. Clothes, cars, music, politics, friends - they're all just social tools to climb up on the social ladder and become popular.

The people who live this life will sooner or later find themselves being duped by their own lifestyle. If you don't know who you are and someone puts you to the test, you're screwed. This is why I say it's so important to have individuality. As opposed to individualism, which is a cult around the individual, individuality is about knowing yourself and believing in who you are. Individuality gives you a sense of self-awareness and completion. You know what you're good at and where you fail. You know your personality, your abilities and characteristics. You feel secure as an individual and will approach other people from your own perspective without feeling nervous.

People with individuality don't need social lifestyles. They might enjoy a certain form of music or wear certain clothes but they don't try to construct a personality around it. Maintaining individuality and belief in who you are, gives you strength and courage. You don't take shit from anyone. How many good hearted people haven't we met that have been caught up in bad relationships where they are mistreated and not cared for? We go crazy and say "Can't you see that he/she is using you? You're so much better than that!"

Good hearted people are often being manipulated and abused because they are easy targets for lunatics and parasites. They are kind, often very self-critical, and always believe that they are the cause for any ill tensions, since they know by heart that they treat other people well. Unfortunately the Christian notion of turning the other cheek, doesn't work. People will smack that cheeck too, with a grin on their face. We live in a ruthless world.

The only way to survive high school, beat college academics and avoid ending up in a failed marriage with someone who'd choose beer and TV over you, is to regain a sense of Self. Learn yourself and accept who you are. Stand up for yourself and make sure other people know you mean it. It doesn't have to involve aggression or arguments. When you notice that someone treats you unfairly or in any case attempts to manipulate you for their own selfish ends, put the foot down and say STOP!

Over time you will notice that it is fully possible to have a strong sense of individuality and still approach people with kindness and generosity. But an early lesson we have to learn is that not all people are deserving of our kindness and generosity is not always rewarded with generosity. Parasites and psychologically defect people are everywhere, especially in our modern age. If you care about yourself - and thus, the people around you who care about you too - you will reject being a chess piece in someone else's game. Take control of your life and make the most out of it; it's too short to waste on people who will never care for you in the first place.