The ideal sexual relationship is that of a man and a woman, committed to each other and to raising a family.

Our society depends strongly upon stable family life, and when this breaks down, it devastates society. Family breakdown causes damaged children, who grow up to be damaged adults. And it creates a vicious cycle as these children have a faulty role model to follow, creating further family breakdown. By now, this is so commonplace as to be considered quite normal and has lost the stigma it had in the past.

The rate of divorce in the US today is supposedly 50% of all marriages. And in the UK it is nearly one in four. Many divorces involve couples who do not yet have children. While it mercifully means no children suffer in a childless divorce, such divorces still damage the institution of marriage.

Marriage is not a personal matter, it is a public declaration of a union, and it involves the joining of families. Traditionally, the extended family of both the bride and groom were being brought together by the marriage, and this is reflected in the terms: "mother-in-law", "brother-in-law" etc. The involvement of family in this way made the vows far more solemn and meaningful than any religious aspect, and family honor was a strong reason for a couple to stay together. These days, breakups are so frequent that families are a lot less involved in them, and the bond in matrimony has been greatly devalued and trivialized. The phenomenon of "gay" marriage only hammered another nail into the whole tradition.

There are a number of reasons why marriages are breaking down so often. One reason is the low birth rate. If one partner wants more children than the other, be it the man or the woman, that partner may begin to look elsewhere, or either partner may become fed up with the other since family life is not at the center of their relationship - an oddity that can cause neurosis. Alternatively, careers can be sufficient distraction from each other to make a relationship run smoothly. Too much time spent together without either career or children to divert attention is likely to put strain on any relationship. But being apart from each other for too long through work commitments is also likely to stretch things to breaking point too. Balance is needed.

The ease of getting divorced has had a significant impact on divorce rates. If the process takes longer, couples are more likely to try to reconcile. Another factor is age - with half of those who marry under the age of 20 getting divorced within ten years, according to US census statistics, compared with a quarter of those aged over 25. Statistics confirm that about 23 to 27 appears to be the overall optimum. Late marriage works better for men than women. The best age gap for long lasting marriage is for the man to be five years older than the woman - but few people are calculating enough to figure this in when they fall in love, so it is all a matter of luck.

Most women prefer their husband a little older and wiser than they. Men don't rate intelligence in a woman as much as women do in men. It's common to find a man fall in love with an idiot, but rare for an intelligent woman to do so. This is another predictor of marriage success.

Falling in love may be easy, but the decision on who is to be one's life partner is also often the most important decision anyone makes. It has a lasting impact on the rest of one's life. How odd it seems that we can only ever meet a tiny fraction of the population, and get to know only a handful of them very well, yet we choose our soul mate from this few. To find the right person at the right time is quite miraculous, and yet it does happen. In the past, people had much less scope for choice than we do now, and yet they had much happier and more stable relationships more of the time.

Many marriages break up due to unrealistic expectations. Adults are less mentally mature than used to be the case, and many have a spoilt brat selfishness: the "me" generation. They expect that they will always get along wonderfully with their partner, and that there will never be any serious arguments or crises. This is unrealistic. Those in strong marriages deal with these upsets and get over them, while the weak ones soon end.

The experience we call being "in love" changes, and while we are blind to the negative behavior of our amours during the initial, most exciting, stage, various foibles come to our notice sooner or later. In successful marriages, the partners forgive each other or take a tolerant attitude, working together to reach compromises. A husband or wife should be like a best friend who can be confided in, and all problems talked through. Communication is the key.

Multiculturalism has had an effect on divorce rates. Modern trends are towards couples living together and never marrying. Blacks have the highest proportion of single mothers, without the father of their child even living with them, and the highest divorce rate of any ethnic group, although few marry in the first place. In social trends, where Blacks lead, Whites soon follow. The culture of the west has suffered by having to accommodate alternative foreign cultures.

Along with this move towards single parenthood, has come increasing tolerance of selfish behavior, with the media portraying recklessness as being cool. People in many cases have self-indulgent lifestyles, disregarding any duty to either their children or the other parent of their children. Arguments over money are another big factor for breaking up relationships. This generation of child-adults see children as a burden they would often rather avoid altogether, imagining that they cramp their style - preventing them from partying, spending on themselves, traveling around and doing whatever pleases their ego. And if these people are the products of a broken marriage such behavior is even more likely.

There are a number of other influences that have put serious strain on male/female relations, such as tolerance of promiscuity and consequential lack of courtship, which has devalued women in the eyes of men, and makes females so easily available that men could question the point in investing in one special woman. (An own-goal scored by women). That and the destructive feminist attempts by women to challenge and compete with men as if there was no reason for them to value men. This leads to men showing as little consideration towards women as they would towards men they compete with, and results in resentment that affects male-female relationships at home as well as at work.

Society is crumbling in a vicious circle, and family breakdown is at the heart of this. It is hard to suggest ways to improve the situation without being in power , being able to change laws, and regulate what is shown in the media to encourage a change of attitude. But CORRUPT.org does try to get people to examine their lives and appreciate what really matters in life. We must each stop and think what we can do to make the future better on a personal level . By doing this we will play a part in establishing healthy values.

by Victoria McMagnus

June 4, 2007