Moving over from the Mailing-List.
I must add self-esteem to my own list of "Nonsense" concepts. I usually go along to get along and use it in the conventional sense, for purposes of communicating with my fellow humans. But self-esteem / self-worth does not exist in biology, physics, or anywhere else. It is simply a relational and contextual variable determined by 'the market' - which market ceased to be pure biology long ago, only to be replaced by an over-socialized, extractive, parasitic system that has evolved to reproduce mostly morons.
In response to the grotesque 'valuation systems' out there, people are told to look inwards to develop their own sense of 'self-worth' without needing 'external validation;' but that leads to a split personality. To evaluate the self, one must become both judge and defendant, subject and object, which is crazy-making.
An arguably sane approach is to look at 'self-worth' like a glass of water that can only be understood relationally, contextually, and under high specificity. What is water worth? To someone who's trying to start fires or dealing with a flood - essentially zero. At the other extreme, in a desert, it may be ... EVERYTHING. Then the self-esteem sky-rockets, go figure (eye roll).
The water didn't change. Only the context did. Otherwise, self-worth means nothing and it's basically a neurotic, perverse notion.
Narcs need to feel like glasses of water to an entire world living in the desert. If they start having doubts about this, they detect something tragic in it. Vulnerable narcs must be literally taught that "it's OK for everyone to NOT like you," or even for most people to not like you.
Narcs act only for themselves because they are unable to connect with and value relevant others. Their existential goal IS ultimately themselves, often through the use of others, institutions, or ideologies. The point is to advance personal goals as dictated by self-image.
In my view, all existential goals worth anything involve a sense of unity and connection with others, therefore life; but that cannot be reduced to abstractions and symbolism (as in "I love humanity"), or mere survival & reproduction.
The DT's toxic iceberg under the water is probably more massive than other hidden things because these people put a lot of effort in curating their personas.